He's Here
by Orihara Arisa
Summary: Haru was insecure. Rin was oblivious. When Rin realized it, it was too late. [RinHaru]
1. Chapter 1

Uh, long time no see, fanfiction. I think I've abandoned you for quite some time. Lots of things happened, and yeah, got writer's block. Soo… since I can't continue my other works, I present you a new one-shot!

He's Here

A fanfiction by Orihara Arisa

For Rizukisa

Disclaimer: Free isn't mine, but this story is mine.

Pairing: Matsuoka RinxHaruka Nanase

Unbetaed.

"So I want you to explain _properly_."

Rin rolled his eyes in irritation. "I told you, she's no one but a random girl!"

"Why would a random girl cling to you out of nowhere like that?" Haru crossed his arms.

"Like hell I know!"

Haru looked totally unconvinced. His usually calm blue eyes now darkened, and Rin knew that it wasn't a good sign.

_But again, I really didn't know! _Rin screamed silently. He was definitely desperate, as he was arguing with Haru for two hours now. And Haru kept repeating that phrase, emphasize on the word 'properly'. Rin, who at first kept his composure, started to lose his cool quickly.

This wasn't the first time since they were going out, having misunderstanding and all, but Haru seemed to be more hard headed recently. Especially now, as he didn't budge at all and still interrogating Rin even though he already explained all that he knew about that girl and their relationship. She was a junior, and that was all Rin know about her.

But Haru still wasn't convinced, and it started to drive Rin crazy.

"I tell you, Haru, if you are insisting that I am two-timing, I really will!"

It's an impulsive remark.

But Haru, after a few frozen seconds, smiled.

And it wasn't just any smile. A pained smile, which Rin hated very much.

"Alright," Haru replied, his voice a little bit lower than usual, "I shall excuse myself."

Haru walked out of his room, dragging his feet. Rin wanted to stop him, but his ego kept him in place.

_It wasn't my fault. He didn't want to accept my explanation._ Rin terribly wanted to justify himself, but he couldn't forget the pained smile that is the first time since they first date each other.

_I guess I'll apologize the next time we meet… _

Rin was not the type to ask apology first. But he really didn't like seeing Haru like that, and he regretted his remark very much. Looking at the rain, he reached to his phone to text Haru.

_Don't get sick._

Rin nearly pressed _Send_, but a thunder roared loudly outside, making Rin flinch and let go of his phone.

Crash!

"Fuck!" Rin spontaneously cursed, and checked his phone. "Off? Damn it!"

Rin threw himself to the bed before putting the phone away. Maybe the phone needed some time to recover, who knows. He wasn't the type who like to text people anyway, perhaps except Haru.

_Then I have to see him tomorrow, _Rin said in determination. He didn't want to make any misunderstanding, this current Haru was especially sensitive.

He really wondered why Haru was that sensitive. Haru's a male, there was no way he would experience PMS (Pre-Menstruation Syndrome), right?

_Then… why was he so pissed and insisting? _Rin couldn't stop thinking about that water-freak, as he was really, really in love with that guy. A faint blush adored Rin's cheeks, and he slapped himself for feeling his own cheeks warmed up.

_Stupid, he was still upset with you! _Rin reminded himself. Not wanting to think about anything anymore, Rin decided to sleep. Through the roaring thunder, he slept….

Without realizing what the thunder had to say.

_Rin: [Then what should I do?]_

_Nagisa: [Hee, it's rare for Haru-chan to be upset.]_

_Makoto: [I think you should apologize properly, and just be patient with him.]_

_Rin: [But he seriously interrogated me for two hours nonstop yesterday!]_

_Nagisa: [Seriously? Whoa, Haru-chan must be reaaally upset.]_

_Makoto: [He's just insecure, Rin. Even though he looks calm and composed, he's actually pretty delicate.]_

_Rin: [Gee, I never think dealing with him would be this complicated.]_

_Nagisa: [But you didn't regret it, right?]_

_Nagisa: [Rin-chan?]_

_Rin: [I… think so.]_

_Nagisa: [Eeh? You sound unsure.]_

_Rin: [Well, too much happened in this short span of time…]_

_Nagisa: [Eeh, but you still love him, right? ]_

_Rin: [Yes, of course, but…]_

_Rin has logged out._

Rin leaned back to his chair, closing his eyes.

_Do you regret dating Haru?_

He really wanted to say no. He had loved Haru all this time, and yet… he found all this interrogating tiring. Would it make Rin's love waver?

_Ding dong._

"Yeess…" Rin reluctantly dragged his feet to open the door of his house. He was visited by someone he least expect to come. "Haru?!"

It was raining, even though it wasn't hard. But weirdly, Haru wasn't wet. Rin frowned, and let him in without any word.

"Let's play hide and seek."

Rin was utterly confused by the sudden request of his boyfriend. "What-"

"Please, close your eyes." Haru's voice was firm and determined, and Rin somewhat complied without realizing.

"Please count until ten," Haru said, "I'll hide. Find me, okay?"

"Yes, yes," Rin replied reluctantly. "One, two, three…"

Silence.

"Four, five, six, seven, eight, Haru, are you even hiding?" Rin opened his eyes, and found no one. Rin frowned, as he didn't hear any footstep, but he began searching anyway.

Bathroom, nope.

Living room, nope.

Corridor, nope.

Storage, nope.

Dining room, nope.

Garage, nope.

_Where the hell is he? _Rin searched the entire house, but didn't find him. A slight anxiety began to creep to his heart, but he brushed it off.

He was nowhere to be found.

Giving up, he shouted, "Haru, I gave up!"

No response. Rin sighed, as he walked back to his room. He entered the room, and smelled something.

_It smelled like Haru… _thought Rin. The smell of water. And one more thing,

His phone was right at the top of his bed. It showed the picture of Rin and Haru, both of them smiling widely. Rin remembered that it was from their last date, but he didn't remember putting it as a wallpaper. Rin always thought it was embarrassing, but there it was, becoming his wallpaper.

He looked at the picture again, especially at Haru. _That smile, why the hell it looked that he's crying to me? _Rin shook his head. _No, what the hell. Now I have to find Haru… but isn't my phone broken? _Rin was very confused.

_Beep beep._

A new message. Strangely, an unpleasant feeling built up in his stomach. Brushing it off, Rin opened the text message.

_Haru's gone. – Makoto_

Rin felt his heart sank to the stomach. _What?_

"Impossible," Rin laughed a little, "the hell, it's rare for Makoto to pull pranks like this. And this isn't my freaking birthday or April Fools!"

Rin texted Makoto back. _The fuck, man, it's not freaking funny._

A little while later, Makoto replied.

_He was hit in front of my fucking two eyes and do you think I am fucking joking?!_

And so Makoto had done it.

Makoto never cursed. Makoto always kept his composure, and Rin knew it well.

Rin knew it too well, but…

"Who the hell played with me then?!" Rin threw his phone across the room, and it crashed to the wall loudly. "Haha, this is not funny. This is not funny! He's fucking here he's fucking here he's fucking here-" Rin ran out his room, searching every room, looking for the blue-eyed boy that he held dear. _You couldn't just disappear when I am trying to make up for everything-_ Rin's thoughts were swirling around his brain, and he felt that he was out of breath. He suddenly felt a boulder over his chest, even though there was nothing there. He found it hard to breathe but he didn't stop. Slamming every door, Rin wildly ran around the house.

The rain was getting worse, thunder roared every now and then, and it didn't even affect Rin in the slightest. He was going around his house in an endless cycle, every room he checked was checked for the second time, third time, fourth time, fifth time, sixth time, seventh time, eighth time, ninth time, tenth time…

And he felt his legs weren't able to carry him anymore.

"He's fucking here…"

"He's here, he's here…"

Rin curled to a fetus position on the cold floor,

But instead of crying, he laughed.

He laughed, maniacally, until tears built up on his eyes.

But he didn't stop laughing. He laughed, laughed and laughed, despite the deafening thunder roaring every now and then, despite the sound of the rain crashing to the ground.

"Which was reality again?" Rin laughed again, seemed to enjoy the twisted happiness of his. After his legs weren't too sore anymore, he stood up and continued looking. When his legs grew tired, he would stop and laughed, and then stood up to look around again. Haru's pained smile flashed every second in Rin's mind, and it seemed to fuel Rin's legs to keep moving, to keep searching. Until the midnight, and until the break of down, that cycle never ends.

Until Makoto called his phone, Rin answered with his hoarse voice. "Hello?"

"You aren't coming to Haru's funeral?"

"What funeral?" Rin laughed maniacally. "He's here. I will find him. I will say sorry and everything will be okay. Bye Makoto." Rin disconnected, and continued his searching.

Makoto, in the other side of the phone, couldn't help but shed a tear.

"You should've said it, Haru… about your insecurities and fears. He will never leave you, even when you've left him," Makoto muttered, staring at the gray, weeping sky. "You shouldn't be that insecure… you've gotten yourself a faithful boyfriend. A little bit too extreme, indeed."

Sighing, Makoto called another number.

Asylum's.


	2. Chapter 2

….Holy, I made a continuation. Short one though. And I'll use this opportunity to thank my first reviewer! :D

Aijoriis: Yay, I succeeded :D I am very happy to hear that, since I really like making readers cry /I am a sadist indeed/. I hope you like this continuation :D And thank you for the review! I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart *bows*

**He's Here (Epilogue)**

For my faithful readers *wink wink*

Disclaimer: Free! Is obviously not mine. I'll make it even more and more angsty if I do.

"Mako-chan, are you checking Haru-chan's facebook?"

"Nope," Makoto replied, his eyes were still glued to the laptop, "why?"

Nagisa sighed. Makoto wasn't able to move on from Haru's death just yet, even though five years had passed. He blamed himself for Haru's death and Rin's breakdown, as both of those events involved him deeply. He overworked himself, even until that day.

"Never mind," Nagisa shook his head, knowing that this news may influence Makoto even more. "Do you want some coffee?"

"Yeah, sure," Makoto continued typing his work, while Nagisa left the room to make some coffee. Makoto quickly opened Facebook, a social media that he had abandoned for five years (yes, right after Haru's death) and went straight to Haru's wall.

And then he froze.

He scrolled down and found the first post after Haru's death.

It's from Rin.

_Happy Anniversary, Haru. Where the hell are you by the way? I said I've give up, I'm not good at hide-and seek, okay? Come on out, don't sulk like that. I promise I'll buy you a heck bunch of mackerel!_

Makoto gritted his teeth, he let out a breath that he didn't remember holding.

_Happy Anniversary (again). I don't know what's the point in doing this, but because all couples seem to do this, maybe I have, too? Anyway, seriously, you sulk too long. It's been two years, idiot. I'm still waiting, don't worry. I am not angry at you. Perhaps I am, but… I think I would rather kiss you when you are back. I miss you so goddamn much._

Makoto was already clenching his mouse, perhaps a little too harsh.

_Happy Anniversary, again? Uh, it's been three years. You really are stubborn, Haru. You never changed. But I'm still waiting. Please, forgive me?_

And he had bitten his lips, hard enough to draw blood.

_Happy Anniversary. It's been four years since we dated each other. It's just four years? It felt like forever to me. Especially you weren't here… damn. What's the difference in having you as a boyfriend or not? By the way, don't sulk because I just write this weird post once a year. I rarely get to connect to the Internet, and the nurse had to accompany me everywhere. Seriously, you have to go here and prove that I am not imagining things, you are fucking alive! Damn Makoto too for sending me here, he believed that you are dead. You are not, right? You are way too stubborn to die so soon._

Tears were building, to the point that he couldn't hold back.

_Happy Anniversary, Haru. Fifth year. I am bored. I want to swim with you again. I want to taste your mackerel again. I want to taste your lips again, it's been five freaking years, after all. Please come here, I miss you so much. Please, just see me one more time? (even though I won't let you go anymore, you damn dolphin.)_

Nagisa stood behind Makoto, who cried silently on the table, and Nagisa didn't have to guess what made Makoto cry.

Nagisa just stood there, staring to Makoto's shaking back.

Before another tear slipped to his pale cheeks.

_The blind faith Rin had for Haru…_

_Is salt for our wounds._

_Until when would you lie to yourself, Rin?_

_And until when would you blame yourself, Makoto?_

_And until when… we would trapped in this endless pain?_

Nagisa smiled painfully.

_Maybe endlessly…_


End file.
